“Hurry up PUPPY!! you better stop pawwing off in there and get your little butt into that bathroom right NOW before Mommy gets really upset” i come darting out of my kennel and into the bathroom naked and plugged with my tail in and ready for my weekly puppy bath that Mommy graciously gives me, “Now puppy! your Mommy got you something extra special today for bathtime that will bring you much closer to being a real pup. Isnt that what you want now Puppy?” “Wruuufffff!!!” i bark out as one woof means yes and two woofs mean no from 
what i was taught in my first day of training and has never left me since. “So jump into that tub now puppy and let Mommy get you all fresh and clean” i hop into the bathtub with excitement for the surprise that will bring me closer to full on pup.
“I think the water temperature is just right now so lets get you all soaking wet like a good lil puppy” She starts filling up bowls of warm water from the faucet and pouring them all over my body making sure every inch of me is soaking wet. I always squirm and jump when Mommy dumps the bowl of water on my face and little nose wishing She could just leave that part out every week. Sadly its for my own good and must suck it up and be a good pup for my Owner. “Such a good puppy for your Mommy” She tells me in the sweetest loving tone that i could honestly never hear that phrase enough in my lifetime. “Are you ready for your surprise now puppy? Your Mommy was at the store earlier and found a soap that was honestly made just for you! i mean really you are one lucky pup that i spotted this in the corner of my eye. This will be your new soap from now on and i just know that your going to love it!” i try to turn my head around but she smacks my face right back and tells me to keep my head forward so i dont get any in my eyes. i do just as i am told so i don’t get another smacking as i can still feel the slight sting from her hand just moments ago. i snap out of it to feeling her squeezing out the cold soapy gel onto my head, back and butt so every part of me gets a even scrubbing and cleaning.
“Now puppy…will you please tell me what you are smelling?” she so softly whispers into my ear. i lift my puppy nose up into the air and take some nice strong whiffs and turn my head in confusion “it ummm smells like grass Mommy?” “Oh puppy you were always the smartest pup in the litter and you never cease to amaze me. That sure is grass you smell sweet little puppy and i do hope you like it..but then again you just really have no say in the matter anyways so I don’t really care what you think. you will learn to love it puppy! This will be your new body odor and scent and life from now on. Do you understand me PUPPY!?!” i perk right up from Mommys loud voice and give one loud bark “WruuuuuuuuuUFFFFF!!!!” so She knows i understand.
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